Mark has had the same friends for more than 30 years and he has had the same job for 25 years. Recently, Mark feels a bit depressed, so he is asking for some professional advice. His therapist has told him to embrace international travel because stasis isn’t healthy.
- Stasis should be avoided.
A wonderful life needs to have an iridescent quality. As I’m writing this article right now, Google displays a disco ball for New Year’s Day. I love this so much because every time the disco ball turns, there is new light and color in each direction! However, we can’t see what a disco ball does if it’s standing still all day long.
“I think I have some depression issues,” says Mark, “I’m not unhappy with my job or my social circle, but I’m just sad. I guess that’s because I’m single.”
“If you don’t have a relationship to go back to after work, that can look like depression in reality,” says his therapist, “That’s because without a relationship, you don’t have a structured life.”
According to this therapist, an unemployed person can feel depressed as well because this person doesn’t have a structured life either. Consequently, unemployment could look like a mental illness, too.
This therapist’s suggestion for Mark is to try international travel which can possibly do a few things for him: 1) By changing his environment, he can make his life multi-dimensional. 2) He might meet someone in a different context and start a romantic relationship. 3) He will expand his outlook and have a much better understanding of how this world works as well as how he should approach various areas of his life.
- A romantic relationship also needs an iridescent quality to it.
When Mark starts a romantic relationship with a woman, he would be well-advised to show all his sides: from the attractive gentleman who goes out with his lady for a night out in the city center to the relaxed guy who likes curling up with his lady on the couch and reading a book or watching TV. A good relationship is the ongoing tension between the formal suit and the loungewear (not just one side). Stagnation isn’t good for a serious, long-term relationship because stasis eliminates the spontaneity and fun.
“International travel adds spontaneity, creativity and fun to your life.”
