I used to like the intensity of relationships, but now I’m alone (not lonely). As I get older, I started to enjoy the stability, balance and grounding in my life. That’s why I’ve been traveling alone.
- Don’t let crazy relationships dominate your mind.
Your primary thoughts become your reality.
When I was much younger, I was surrounded by people who were crazy about relationships. At that time, being single was not acceptable in my social circle. Consequently, I thought I must be in a relationship – I just wanted to fit in! 🔥
After being in a few crazy relationships, I realized that I didn’t even have the bandwidth to do anything else when I was in a relationship like that. The anxiety became dominant and I couldn’t even focus on my career or other goals in life.
I really must get more grounded, so I decided to travel alone.
Now no one is telling me that I must be in a relationship. I’ve decided to listen to my inner voice rather than anyone else’s opinion because most of the time, those people just want to be right. But do they know what’s right for me? 😎
Don’t get me wrong. I am definitely not saying relationships are bad. Actually, I still think relationships can be amazing. I still believe in love. I’m just saying right now I choose to be single – I want to travel alone now. I believe that when the time is right, I will be in a relationship in the future. ⛱️
- Learn to enjoy calm and normality.
Now I eat better, sleep better and feel better overall. Self-care starts from eliminating the illusion and building a life that I’m proud of. 🍹
At last, I have the time to carefully reflect on my relationship patterns: they were similar – they thought I was naïve (I probably was naïve to some degree, but it doesn’t mean I was stupid). There is a difference between lack of experience and lack of intelligence. I have to say that I was not experienced when I was younger, but I was always smart. 💃
That’s why I ended toxic relationships as soon as possible. 🎉
Now I really enjoy the normality and calm in my life. Now I can have my phone in the kitchen all night without worrying about social media; meanwhile, I can do something mindful and chill with myself without having anything exciting going on.
Traveling alone gives me the opportunity to take a pause from modern technology and a large amount of workload as well. At last, I can have some time for proper me time. I’m pretty sure when I slowly reintroduce stuff to my life, I will be able to do it gradually and mindfully. Then I’ll be ready for the right relationship. 🥂
Here is a list of things that I love doing when I’m alone:
First, I like dancing to the music in the kitchen. I can do this at any time now. My favorite song is Savage Garden’s Affirmation!
Second, I love watching Mad Men on the couch… nonstop!
Third, I can sleep in because now I can finally wake up whenever I want to!
Next, I like the fact that now I’m building my career – now I have the time to focus on my dreams.
In a healthy relationship, I should be able to do all of those things as well. Having said that, when I add more people to my life, my ‘me time’ will probably shrink. Hence, I should enjoy more ‘me time’ now when I still can!
“The person that I date will have to add tremendous value to my life in order to get a space in my fabulous life.”