Some people find it harder to make new friends as adults. Indeed, for most people, they met their best friends when they were young. If you are in your 30s or 40s, chances are it’s a bit harder for you to make new friends now. But research shows that international travel can help you to make new friends no matter how old you are because when people are traveling, they are more open-minded, relaxed and curious about this world
Closed Loop VS Open Loop:
If you crash a party and meet new people, it’s your responsibility to use your conversation skills to make friends there. The most important concept in conversations is the closed loop and the open loop. Let me explain
The closed loop doesn’t invite the listener to participate in the interaction, e.g., “You look amazing.” (I know the listener might say “Thank you”, but that’s a default response rather than real contribution to the interaction.)
By contrast, the open loop invites the listener to participate in the interaction, e.g., “You look amazing, but there is something unusual about you.” Now the listener wants to know what’s so unusual about them, so they will ask you questions for clarification.
So, when you meet new people, you’d better use the open loop more often so that you will be able to have more engaging conversations and make new friends!
How to make friends with a group of people:
When you meet a group of people in a nightclub, you can ask them, “Are you guys best friends?”
Now they begin to wonder if they are good friends or best friends. Or they start to wonder what makes you ask them whether they are best friends or not. Now you are engaging.
If they ask you to explain why you think they are best friends, you can say something along the lines of, “I just noticed that both of you have really good taste in terms of fashion & your taste is the same as your friend’s taste.”
Now the conversation is thought-provoking. You have started a stimulating conversation with a group of people. Of course, this technique works better if you are approaching two people rather than 5 people.
International travel gives you opportunities to meet new people. Are you making friends with them?
“As an adult, it’s probably not very easy to make new friends, but international travel can surely help!”
